PSALM 51:1-12

[51:1] Have mercy on me, O God,  according to your steadfast love;

           according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions.

[2] Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin!

[3] For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me.

[4] Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight,

      so that you may be justified in your words and blameless in your judgment.

[5] Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me.

[6] Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being, and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart.

[7] Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.

[8] Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice.

[9] Hide your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities.

[10] Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.

[11] Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me.

[12] Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.

Bill Cosby tells a cute story about a little boy who wanted a cookie before dinner but his mother said “no.” Well, the little boy really wanted the cookie.  So when his mother was out of the room he pulled a chair over to the counter.  As soon as he put his hand in the cookie jar though his mother walked back into the kitchen.  She looked at him with a frown on her face and began to scold him. “Didn’t I tell you that you ‘No cookies’ before dinner?” she said.  The little boy turned around and with an innocent look on his face whimpered,   “Yes, but I was only getting it for you.”

That’s one way of handling guilt.  You cover it up with a little white lie. Or you minimize it with all kinds of excuses. Or you could do what a man did when he went to see his psychiatrist.   “Doc,” the man said, “you’ve got to help me. Every night I’m out drinking and gambling and partying till the sun comes up.  I’m cheating on my wife and my conscience is killing me.”  “I see,” the psychiatrist said.  “So you want me to help you strengthen your willpower.”  “No,” the man said.  “I was hoping you could give me something that would weaken my conscience.”

David wasn’t like that.  At least he wasn’t like that when he sat down and wrote the words to the 51^st Psalm.  When you read those words it’s clear that they are coming from a man who is truly sorry for what he’s done.

Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love;

according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions.

Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin!

For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me.

David pours out his heart and soul in this psalm. That’s because David understands that he’s guilty of committing adultery.  He understand that he’s responsible for the death of Bathsheba’s husband.  He understands that he’s lied and done some really terrible things.  Remember no.  David didn’t write this psalm and then hide it in a drawer somewhere.  No.  David stands up and publicly declares his guilt in a service of worship by reading this psalm.  David basically says, “I did it.  I’m guilty.  Please forgive me Lord.”

What a refreshing dose of honesty.   It makes you wonder.  Why can’t people be honest like that today?  Well, we know the answer to that question.   Sometimes it’s because their pride gets in the way.   They’re embarrassed and they don’t want to look bad.  Sometimes it’s because they don’t want to face the music.  They don’t want to accept the punishment for their actions. 

That’s what happened many years ago when a medical supply company got in trouble for juggling its books.   This story actually appeared in the Chicago Tribune magazine.  The company made it look like it was making money when it was actually loosing money.  The company went to great lengths to hide the truth.  So much so that when the company was audited it actually deceived the auditors by moving inventory from warehouse to warehouse.  When the fraud was finally discovered did the company fess up?  No.  It sued the auditing company.  It said that the fraud never would have occurred in the first place if the auditors had done a better job auditing the company. It actually took the auditing firm 11 years to win the case and clear its name.

Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love;

according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions.

Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin!

For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me.

There are lots of reasons why you don’t hear honesty like that these days and perhaps the biggest reason of all is because when someone admits their guilt people usually aren’t very nice. Just look at the brouhaha over Rush Limbaugh and his comments.   When he said he was sorry did people accept the apology?  No. They went on the attack and said it wasn’t sincere.  They said he only did it because he was loosing advertisers.   They said the same thing when Tiger Woods got in front of a microphone and admitted that he had had numerous extramarital affairs.   Did people commend him for his honesty?  No they condemned him for being a phony and a fraud.  Many years ago Pope John Paul II issued a public apology and admitted that the church could have done more during World War II to save Jews from the Holocaust.  Did people praise him for that act of contrition?  No.  They went on the attack and said that the apology was too little too late.  

The problem today is that an admission of guilt usually leads to an avalanche of criticism and condemnation.   What a terrible person you are!  I’m glad I’m not like that.  How can I ever trust you again. You should be ashamed of yourself. 

That’s not they way it’s supposed to work though.   Guilt shouldn’t lead to attacks and more guilt.  Guilt should lead to a humble heart and God’s grace which in turn leads you to a new life marked by deeds of loving kindness. Or to put it more simply.  Guilt….grace….goodness.  It’s the same thing that David was looking for when he read that psalm in front of all those people many years ago.

“Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me.

Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.”

Ben Burton is an author and a public speaker who knows what guilt is and what it should really do.   You can see it in a little essay he wrote called “The Martyrdom of Andy.”  Andy Drake was a boyhood friend from school who lived on the wrong side of the tracks.  His father was in prison and his mother made ends meet by taking in laundry and men meet.  Andy’s poverty could be seen in his clothes that were often dirty and didn’t fit very well.  One day Ben and a group of friends including Andy decided they were going to campout in the woods behind Ben’s house.  The boys decided though that they didn’t want Andy in their group anymore and they insisted that Ben was the one who had to tell him because it was his backyard.  When Andy heard the news he was crushed. Remembering that moment Ben Burton wrote these words:

“Andy looked at me – frozen for an eternal moment – what was it?  It wasn’t hate.  Was it shock? Was it disbelief?  Or, was it pity – for me?  Or forgiveness?  …Andy’s poor attendance in school made it difficult to tell when he actually withdrew, but one day it dawned on me that he was gone forever…But to say  I haven’t seen Andy is not entirely accurate.  In the decades since that autumn day in the Arkansas woods, I have encountered thousands of Andy Drakes.  My conscience places Andy’s mask over the face of every disadvantaged person with whom I come in contact…

Dear Andy Drake:

The chance you will ever see these words is quite remote, but I must try.  It’s much too late for this confession to purge my conscience of guilt.  I neither expect it to nor want it to.  What I do pray for, my little friend of long ago, is that you might somehow learn of and be lifted by the continuing force of your sacrifice.  What you suffered at my hands that day and the loving courage you showed, God has twisted, turned and molded into a blessings.  This knowledge might ease the memory of that terrible day for you.  I’ve been no saint, Andy, nor have I done all the things I could and should have done with my life.  But what I want you to know is that I have never, again knowingly betrayed and Andy Drank.  Nor, I pray, shall I ever.  Ben Burton.”

That’s the way guilt is supposed to work.

Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love;

according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions.

…………………….

Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me.

Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.”  Amen.

Rev. Dr. Richard A. Hughes

March 25, 2012