“SAVED BY A CRITICAL CONVERSATION”
JOHN 4:4-30
4 But he had to go through Samaria.
5 So he came to a Samaritan city called
Sychar, near the plot of ground that Jacob had given to his son Joseph.
6 Jacob's well was there, and Jesus, tired
out by his journey, was sitting by the well. It was about noon.
7 A Samaritan woman came to draw water,
and Jesus said to her, "Give me a drink."
8 (His disciples had gone to the city
to buy food.)
9 The Samaritan woman said to him, "How
is it that you, a Jew, ask a drink of me, a woman of Samaria?" (Jews do not share things in common with Samaritans.)
10 Jesus answered her, "If you knew
the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, 'Give me a drink,' you would have asked him, and he would have given
you living water."
11 The woman said to him, "Sir, you
have no bucket, and the well is deep. Where do you get that living water?
12 Are you greater than our ancestor
Jacob, who gave us the well, and with his sons and his flocks drank from it?"
13 Jesus said to her, "Everyone who
drinks of this water will be thirsty again,
14 but those who drink of the water
that I will give them will never be thirsty. The water that I will give will become in them a spring of water gushing up to
eternal life."
15 The woman said to him, "Sir, give
me this water, so that I may never be thirsty or have to keep coming here to draw water."
16 Jesus said to her, "Go, call your
husband, and come back."
17 The woman answered him, "I have
no husband." Jesus said to her, "You are right in saying, 'I have no husband';
18 for you have had five husbands,
and the one you have now is not your husband. What you have said is true!"
19 The woman said to him, "Sir, I
see that you are a prophet.
20 Our ancestors worshiped on this mountain,
but you say that the place where people must worship is in Jerusalem."
21 Jesus said to her, "Woman, believe me,
the hour is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem.
22 You worship what you do not know;
we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews.
23 But the hour is coming, and is
now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father seeks such as these to worship
him.
24 God is spirit, and those who worship
him must worship in spirit and truth."
25 The woman said to him, "I know
that Messiah is coming" (who is called Christ). "When he comes, he will proclaim all things to us."
26 Jesus said to her, "I am he, the
one who is speaking to you."
27 Just then his disciples came. They
were astonished that he was speaking with a woman, but no one said, "What do you want?" or, "Why are you speaking with her?"
28 Then the woman left her water jar
and went back to the city. She said to the people,
29 "Come and see a man who told me
everything I have ever done! He cannot be the Messiah, can he?"
30 They left the city and were on
their way to him.
Miss
Manners would have undoubtedly been shocked. When you look at the conversation that took place at the well that day, it’s
obvious that Jesus committed a little bit of a faux pas. It wasn’t an accident
either. Jesus actually went out of his way to put that Samaritan woman on the spot.
In doing that he embarrassed her..
Now, nobody likes to be embarrassed. Take the minister from Seattle for example. It all started when he went on a vacation with his family to the Pocono Mountains. While they
were there they attend a little Methodist
Church. Unfortunately, the weather that morning was hazy, hot and unbearably humid. People were having a hard time focusing on the sermon. All of that changed though
when the minister suddenly made a startling confession. “You know,” he said, “some of the best years of
my life were spent in the arms of another man’s wife.” Immediately,
the congregation was horrified. Half of them let out a loud gasp and a few of
the others dropped their hymnals. At that point the minister smiled and said, “Don’t worry. That woman was my
mother.” Well, the minister from Seattle remembered that little gimmick
when he found himself in a similar situation the following summer. Once again
the sanctuary was unbearably hot and people were having a hard time staying awake. So,
the minister decided to go for it. “You know,” he said, “some of the best years of my life were spent in
the arms of another man’s wife.” Once again people were horrified. Some of them let out a loud gasp and some of them began to fidget a little. While
all of that was going on though the poor minister experienced a brain cramp and forgot what he was supposed to say next. So,
he hemmed and hawed a little, and then without thinking blurted out, “And for the life of me, I can’t remember
her name.”
It’s bad enough when you embarrass yourself. It’s even worse when someone else embarrasses you. That’s exactly what happened though in that conversation Jesus had with the Samaritan woman. The
conversation started off innocently enough. They talked about this and that and
then Jesus dropped his bombshell. When the woman said she wasn’t married
Jesus said, “You are right in saying, 'I have no husband'; for you have had five husbands, and the one you have now
is not your husband. What you have said is true!”
Instead of ignoring the woman’s little indiscretion
Jesus brought it out into the open. It must have embarrassed her a little. It must have made her a little uncomfortable. It
makes you wonder. Why did Jesus put the spotlight on her like that? If you think
it was his way of proving to her that he really was the messiah I’d have to disagree with you. After all, Jesus could
have done that by telling her when or where she was born. Or he could have performed
a miracle of some kind. Jesus didn’t do that though which leaves only one other possibility.
Jesus exposed the woman’s indiscretion because he
wanted her to change. He wanted her to live her life differently. It’s called criticism and it’s something that
we go to great lengths to avoid in our assiduously feel good society. These days you’re not supposed to say anything
bad about anyone. It’s why we don’t talk about sin anymore. It’s also why we have all of those politically
correct phrases. For example, people these days aren’t short. They’re vertically challenged. No one is handicapped
either. Instead what we have are people who are differently abled.
Jesus wasn’t always politically correct though.
Sometimes he was a little critical of people and what they were doing with their lives. On more than one occasion he healed
a person and then told the person to go and sin no more. Jesus even criticized the Pharisees by calling them a brood of vipers.
What all of this suggests is that sometimes criticism
is good. Sometimes criticism can make you better. Of course, that doesn’t mean that criticism is always easy to hear
and accept. How about yourself? How do you react when you’re on the receiving
end of a little criticism? Some people respond to criticism by fighting back. Some people respond by dismissing the criticism entirely. Or they become overly critical themselves. They start to look
for the bad in the people around them.
A good example of that can be seen in a sign that a man
down in Florida posted in his restaurant.
The sign made it clear that the man was of the opinion that most people aren’t exactly honest and can’t
be trusted. The sign was posted at the register and stated very clearly, “No checks will be accepted unless you’re
over 80 years of age and accompanied by a parent.”
Sometimes criticism makes you uncomfortable. Sometimes
it makes you angry. Sometimes it hurts. So, whenever you’re on the receiving end of a little criticism you have to make
a decision. You have to decide if you’re going to let the criticism make you bitter or if you’re going to let
the criticism make you better. Are you going to walk away in a huff and think
about what you can do to get even? Or are you going to be honest with yourself
and use the criticism to become the person God created you to be?
Norman Vincent Peale once said something very interesting
about criticism. What he said was, “Most people would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.”
Which would you prefer? Would you prefer people to lavish
you with false praise or reach out to you with honest criticism? The Samaritan woman at the well listened to the criticism.
She didn’t get insulted. She didn’t tell Jesus to get lost. She didn’t
make any excuses for her behavior. She listened to what he had to say.
Criticism can be a blessing.
In the book Small
Miracles a woman tells a story where she was on the receiving end of a little criticism even though she wasn’t
aware of it at the time. Apparently, the woman had a mother who didn’t have a lot of money and was constantly turning
to her for support. The mother did that even though the woman didn’t have
a lot of money herself. One day in the middle of a brutal heat wave the woman got a call from the mother. This time the mother
asked her for an air conditioner. Now, this request came after the woman had
just paid some doctor bills for her mother, bought her some summer clothes and taken her on a trip to the beach. So, an air conditioner was out of the question. The woman
made that clear as she shouted “Not now!” and slammed the phone down. Later
that evening the woman came home from work and discovered that her air conditioner wasn’t working. It wasn’t long before she was miserable. No matter what she did she couldn’t cool herself off. Finally, in the midst of her suffering she suddenly sat up in her bed and thought
about her mother. “My poor mother!” she said to herself. “How could I have been so insensitive, so uncaring?” The woman was overwhelmed with remorse
and made a promise to herself. “First thing in the morning I’m going
to buy her an air conditioner! I won’t even go to work until I make sure
the air conditioner is installed in her bedroom….(In fact) I’m going to buy her one for every room in the house.” As soon as she made that promise to herself the woman settled back into her bed and
a few seconds later her air conditioner came back to life.”
Sometimes the Lord reaches out to you with a little bit
of criticism. That criticism can come from a friend, or a relative. It can even
come from someone who doesn’t really like you. Some times the criticism
can be found in an unusual twist or turn of events like a broken air conditioner. It doesn’t matter when or where or
how it happens. After everything is said and done you have to decide if
you’re going to let the criticism make you bitter or better. The Samaritan
woman at the well decided to let it make her better. Amen.
Rev. Dr. Richard A. Hughes
February
27, 2005
