“A PLEA NOT TO PLEASE”

MARK 6:14-29

14 King Herod heard of it, for Jesus' name had become known. Some said, “John the Baptist has been raised from the dead. That is why these miraculous powers are at work in him.”

15 But others said, “He is Elijah.” And others said, “He is a prophet, like one of the prophets of old.”

16 But when Herod heard of it, he said, “John, whom I beheaded, has been raised.”

17 For it was Herod who had sent and seized John and bound him in prison for the sake of Herodias, his brother Philip's wife, because he had married her.

18 For John had been saying to Herod, “It is not lawful for you to have your brother's wife.”

19 And Herodias had a grudge against him and wanted to put him to death. But she could not,

20 for Herod feared John, knowing that he was a righteous and holy man, and he kept him safe. When he heard him, he was greatly perplexed, and yet he heard him gladly.

21 But an opportunity came when Herod on his birthday gave a banquet for his nobles and military commanders and the leading men of Galilee.

22 For when Herodias's daughter came in and danced, she pleased Herod and his guests. And the king said to the girl, “Ask me for whatever you wish, and I will give it to you.”

23 And he vowed to her, “Whatever you ask me, I will give you, up to half of my kingdom.”

24 And she went out and said to her mother, “For what should I ask?” And she said, “The head of John the Baptist.”

25 And she came in immediately with haste to the king and asked, saying, “I want you to give me at once the head of John the Baptist on a platter.”

26 And the king was exceedingly sorry, but because of his oaths and his guests he did not want to break his word to her.

27 And immediately the king sent an executioner with orders to bring John's [4] head. He went and beheaded him in the prison

28 and brought his head on a platter and gave it to the girl, and the girl gave it to her mother.

29 When his disciples heard of it, they came and took his body and laid it in a tomb.

Do you ever feel like someone is taking advantage of you?  The other day I read a “Dear Abby” type of letter in the newspaper.  The letter was from a man who was tired of his family taking advantage of him. In the letter the man wrote,  “Dear Margo,

“I am sick and tired of my mother expecting me to fix everything. When my siblings get in financial trouble, she expects me to bail them out because I have a better job thanks to my college degree…My mother also expects me to spend all my vacations and weekends doing maintenance and remodeling on her home, even though I live out of town…Would it  be wrong to tell my siblings “no” when they ask for money?  Would it be wrong to tell my mother to hire someone to do the work on the house, or that she and her roommate should pay for the projects themselves?    The son signed his letter “Tired of Being Mr. Fixit”

It sounds to me like this man got tired of trying to please his mother and his siblings. That’s the danger when you’re a pleaser.  There’s always someone who will gladly take advantage of your willingness to be a pleaser.  That’s because there are people in this world who only think about themselves and what they want.

Those people are like a man named Boudreaux who lived down in Louisiana.  Every Friday night after work Boudreaux loved to fire up his grill and begin his weekend with a big juicy steak.  Unfortunately, all of Boudreaux’s neighbors were Catholic which meant that his big juicy steak was a problem for them during Lent.  It was hard for them to bear the mouth watering aroma from the big juicy steak when they couldn’t eat meat. So, the neighbors went to see their local priest. They asked him for his help and guidance.  The priest responded to their plea by paying Boudreaux a visit.  During the visit the priest suggested that everyone might be better off if Boudreaux became a Catholic.  Well, Boudreaux was willing to give it a try. A few months later, after he attended the required classes, the priest sprinkled holy water over him. “Boudreaux,” the priest declared, “you were born a Baptist and raised a Baptist but now you’re a Catholic.”  Boudreaux’s neighbors were greatly relieved, but then Friday night arrived. Once again they were tormented by the mouth watering aroma of a big juicy steak.  The local priest was summoned once again.  When he got there he was surprised to find Boudreaux standing at his grill clutching a small bottle of holy water.  The priest was even more surprised when Boudreaux sprinkled the holy water over the meat and declared, “You wuz born a cow and you was raised a cow, but now you is a catfish.”

There are people in this world who think only about themselves and what they want.  That’s why it’s can being a pleaser can be dangerous. Are you a pleaser? Did you know that Herod was a pleaser?

You can see it in the events that led up to the death of John the Baptist.  Before we look at that tragic story though we need to understand that the Herod who had John the Baptist beheaded was not the same Herod who was king when Jesus was born. The Herod who was king when Jesus was born was Herod the Great.  The Herod who had John the Baptist beheaded was his son Herod Antipas.

Now the younger Herod was a powerful man, but when it came to his wife he was definitely a pleaser. You can see it in the arrest of John the Baptist.  Mark tells us that Herod had John the Baptist arrested “for the sake of his wife Herodias.” Herod didn’t want to have John the Baptist arrested.  Herod actually admired John the Baptist.  It was Herodias who hated him. The reason she hated him was simple. She hated John the Baptist because while everyone else was sending her lavish wedding gifts he was condemning her marriage to Herod.  So, Herodias nagged her husband until he had John the Baptist arrested.  Herodias was also the one who later got her daughter Salome to ask for head of John the Baptist on a platter.

When it came to his wife, Herod was a little like the boss who didn’t get any respect from his employees. The boss eventually got tired of not getting the respect that he deserved. So, one day he went out and bought a sign that said, “I'm the Boss!" He then went back to the office and hung the sign on his office door.  The sign didn’t go unnoticed.  In fact, a few days later the boss came back from lunch and saw a noted taped to his new sign.  The note simply said, "Your wife called, she wants her sign back!"

Herod was a pleaser when it came to his wife and the end result was both a tragedy and a travesty of justice.   In the end everyone paid a price. John the Baptist was executed for simply speaking the truth.  Herod looked like a fool for allowing his wife to manipulate him into something he didn’t want to do. Then there’s Herodias and her daughter.  By pleasing her Herod enabled Herodias to be selfish and heartless.  By pleasing her Herod also made it possible for Herodias to corrupt her daughter Salome.  He made it possible for her to get her involved in her sleazy sinister plot.

All that pain and suffering because Herod tried to please his wife Herodias.  Can you see why being a pleaser can be dangerous?  More often than not it doesn’t make a relationship better.  It makes a relationship worse!  I see it all the time. I watch parents try to please their children and I wonder what those children are going to be like when they grow up?

I also wonder how many marriages fail because the husband tried to please the wife or the wife tried to please the husband when they were dating.  Unfortunately, you can’t go on pleasing forever and when you stop pleasing the relationship often comes to an end.

The events that led up to the death of John the Baptist make it clear. Being a pleaser isn’t the best way to show someone that you love him or her.  In fact, pleasing isn’t love at all. Love means you don’t always give your children or your spouse, your family or your friends what they want.  Love means that sometimes you say “no” to your children or your spouse, your family or your friends.

Now there is a way you can avoid the dangers of being a pleaser.  Just look at John the Baptist.  John the Baptist wasn’t interested in pleasing Herod or Herodias or Salome. The only thing that mattered to John the Baptist was his desire to please God.

That’s the key right there.  Instead of trying to please the people around you, focus instead on pleasing God.  When you do that you will inevitably do what’s best for you and for the people around you.  Think about it for a minute.  What would have happened if Herod had decided instead to please God instead of Herodias.  I’ll tell you what would have happened.  John the Baptist would have kept his head.  Herod would have kept his dignity and Salome would have kept her innocence.  Herodias wouldn’t have liked it but that’s the thing about people who think only about themselves and what they want. They’re emotional black holes.  The suck the life and energy and happiness out of the people around them and no matter what you do it’s never enough.

It is said that when the great composer Giuseppe Verdi was a young man he wrote an opera that was mediocre at best. The first time the opera was performed in Florence , whoever, the audience stood and cheered with great enthusiasm.  Verdi paid no attention to the cheers though.  Instead he looked up into a private box where Gioachino Rossini was sitting.  Rossini was the greatest Italian composer of the day. He wrote a number of famous operas including “The Barber of Seville.”  While everyone was cheering Rossini just sat there with a frown on his face.  You see, Rossini knew that Verdi could do better.

Imagine how much better our lives and our world would be if we stopped trying to please the people around us and focused on pleasing the God instead. Maybe there’d be less violence and greed, fewer broken homes and more integrity in our politicians, our athletes and ourselves..  It’s too late to save John the Baptist, but it isn’t too late to save yourself and someone you love.  Amen.

Rev. Dr. Richard A. Hughes

July 12, 2009