“REJECTING THE REJECTION”

ACTS 1:15-26

15 In those days Peter stood up among the brothers (the company of persons was in all about 120) and said,

16 “Brothers, the Scripture had to be fulfilled, which the Holy Spirit spoke beforehand by the mouth of David concerning Judas, who became a guide to those who arrested Jesus.

17 For he was numbered among us and was allotted his share in this ministry.”

18 (Now this man acquired a field with the reward of his wickedness, and falling headlong he burst open in the middle and all his bowels gushed out.

19 And it became known to all the inhabitants of Jerusalem, so that the field was called in their own language Akeldama, that is, Field of Blood.)

20 “For it is written in the Book of Psalms,

“‘May his camp become desolate,

and let there be no one to dwell in it’;

and

“‘Let another take his office.’

21 So one of the men who have accompanied us during all the time that the Lord Jesus went in and out among us,

22 beginning from the baptism of John until the day when he was taken up from us—one of these men must become with us a witness to his resurrection.”

23 And they put forward two, Joseph called Barsabbas, who was also called Justus, and Matthias.

24 And they prayed and said, “You, Lord, who know the hearts of all, show which one of these two you have chosen

25 to take the place in this ministry and apostleship from which Judas turned aside to go to his own place.”

26 And they cast lots for them, and the lot fell on Matthias, and he was numbered with the eleven apostles.

When was the last time someone said “no” to you?   It’s called rejection and it happens all the time.  It happened many years ago to a man and his family when they decided to go Christmas caroling one evening.  When they got to the first house in the posh community of Hillsborough, California a woman opened the door and shook her head.  “Look,” she said, “I’m just too busy.  The plumbing is giving me problems. I can’t get anyone to fix it and I’ve got a mob coming for dinner.  If you really feel like singing carols, come back around nine o’clock, okay?”   Now I wasn’t there of course, but I don’t think that was the reaction that Bing Crosby thought he was going to get.

Rejection happens to the best of us.  So, what do you do when it happens to you?  How do you handle rejection? I wonder how Justus handled it.  His painful moment of rejection came when the disciples decided that they needed to replace Judas.  It eventually came down to a choice between Justus and another man by the name of Matthias. In the end the disciples said, “yes” to Matthias and “no” to Justus.  Ouch! 

It hurts when you feel the sting of rejection and it happens all the time.  It happens when the older kids in the neighborhood tell you that you’re too little to play baseball with them.  It happens when you ask someone to go to the prom with you and the person turns you down.  It happens when you interview for a job and the employer says, “I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to go with the other person.” 

What do you do when you feel the sting of rejection?  I’m going to suggest that you start by remember that the Christian faith is a faith that was built on the ashes of rejection!  We’re here today not because Jesus was loved.  We’re here because he was rejected. He was rejected by the high priest and the Pharisees.  He was rejected by Pontius Pilate and the Romans.  He was even rejected by his disciples.  Do you remember what Peter said after Jesus was arrested?  When someone insisted that Peter was with Jesus when he was arrested Peter took an oath and insisted, “I do not know the man.”  (Matthew 27:74)

Interestingly enough after Peter is filled with the Holy Spirit on the Day of Pentecost he rejects his previous words of rejection.  He then challenges the high priest along with his followers and says to them, “This Jesus is the stone that was rejected by you, the builders, (and it) has become the cornerstone.”  (Acts 4:11)

Jesus was rejected but he didn’t let the rejection get the best of him.  He went right on teach, preaching and healing people.  Because he did that we have a faith that promises us “forgiveness of sins, fullness of grace, courage in the struggle for justice and peace, his presence in trial and rejoicing and eternal life in his kingdom which has no end.” What all of that suggests is that God can take rejection and bring something good out of it.

In order for that to happen though you have to do what Jesus did.  You have to reject the rejection. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself you have to reject the rejection.  Instead of getting angry and letting yourself become bitter you have to reject the rejection.  Instead of deciding that you really are a loser you have to reject the rejection!

Tony Campolo is a Christian author and motivational speaker who has been featured at conferences around the world. One day his wife Peggy told him that she didn’t like going to those conferences with him.  When he asked her why she said that she often felt intimidated when she was around all those very successful and important people. It made her question her self-worth as a stay at home mother.  Upon hearing that her husband made a suggestion.  “Well,” he said “why don’t you come up with something you could say when you meet people that will let them know that you strongly value what you do.”  Not long after that Tony and Peggy Campolo were at a conference when a woman said to Peggy in a somewhat condescending tone, “Well, my dear, what do you do?”  Peggy Campolo was ready for the question and her husband must have smiled when she said, “I am nurturing two Homo Sapiens into the dominant values of the Judeo-Christian tradition in order that they might become instruments for the transformation of the social order into the kind of eschatological utopia God envisioned from the beginning of time.” Upon hearing that the other woman replied, “Oh, my, I'm just a lawyer.”

Jesus rejected the rejection.  Sometimes the best thing you can do is to also reject the rejection.  Of course, sometimes the best thing you can do when it comes to rejection is to say “thank you.”  That’s because sometimes there’s a good reason for the rejection.  

It could be that you don’t have the skills required to do a job.  It could be that you need to change the way you’re living your life.  It could be that the rejection is an opportunity to grow and learn an important lesson.

That was certainly true for the young man who walked into an job interview one day and announced to the owner of the company that he could relax because his search was over.  The young man tossed his resume on the owner’s desk. He then went on to tell him what was wrong with the company and how he could fix it within the first year of his employment.  After going on and on like that for several minutes the young man finally stood up and offered the owner one last bit of advice. “You’d better make your decision soon,” he said. “After all I do have other irons in the fire!”  At that point the owner handed the resume back to the young man and said, “If you have other irons in the fire then I would suggest that you put this resume in with them!”

Sometimes a rejection can be an opportunity to grow and learn an important lesson. When the opportunity to grow and learn an important lesson isn’t there the best thing you can do is reject the rejection. 

Twenty-two years ago a young man by the name of William Scott Markle decided to reject a rejection.  He did that when he decided to search for the birthmother who gave him up for adoption when he was a baby. When he found her he sat down and wrote her a letter.  In the letter he asked her if they could meet.  He included his telephone number in the letter and then he mailed it.  A couple of weeks later he went to his mailbox and saw a letter with a handwriting on it that he didn’t recognize.  It took him a few seconds before I realized that the letter was from his birthmother.  He immediately panicked.  He panicked because he had assumed that if his birthmother wanted to me him she would have picked up the phone and called him. He was convinced that the letter meant that she didn’t want to have anything to do with him. So, he sat there on the couch trembling with the letter in his hand.  He was too afraid to open the letter.  He didn’t want to be rejected again.

Finally he mustered up the courage he needed and opened the letter.  This is what his birthmother wrote,

Dear Rick…She began the letter that way is because I am William Scott Markle.  That’s the name my birthmother gave me when I was born.  Dear Rick,

Your letter did not come as a complete surprise.  I’ve always believed I would hear from you.  It was just a question of when…I would like very much to meet you for lunch and exchange stories of the past 31 years.  Incidentally, the last time I saw you was in Quincy in your foster mother’s home.  It was a very difficult time in my life…As yet no one in my family knows about you.  Not that I plan to keep you a secret, but I need to get used to you as a person instead of the WSM with your current age on each year’s calendar.

By the way, I made the decision to more beyond the rejection and search for my birthmother after I read a poem and heard God speaking to me in that poem.  The poem is called “The Legacy Of An Adopted Child” and it goes like this:

Once there were two women, who did not know each other.

One you don’t remember, the other you call mother.

Two very different lives shaped yours into one.

One became your guiding star, the other was your sun.

One gave you a nationality, the other gave you a name.

One gave you the seed of talent, the other gave you an aim.

One gave you emotions, the other calmed your fears.

One saw your first sweet smile, the other dried your tears.

The first gave you life, the second taught you to live it.

The first gave you a need for love, the second was there to give it.

One made the decision to give you up—it was all that she could do.

The other prayed and prayed for a child and God led her straight to you.

And now you ask me through your tears,

The age-old question of the years,

Heredity or Environment, which are you a product of?

Neither my darling, neither - just two different kinds of Love.

God’s grace is always there to bring something good out of a rejection. That will happen when you do one of two things.  It will happen when you use the rejection to grow and learn from it.  Or it will happen when you pick yourself up, dust yourself off and reject the rejection. Amen.

Rev. Dr. Richard A. Hughes

May 24, 2009