“SAYING BYE TO BY AND BY”

I SAMUEL 16:1-13

16:1  The LORD said to Samuel, "How long will you grieve over Saul? I have rejected him from being king over Israel. Fill your horn with oil and set out; I will send you to Jesse the Bethlehemite, for I have provided for myself a king among his sons."

2  Samuel said, "How can I go? If Saul hears of it, he will kill me." And the LORD said, "Take a heifer with you, and say, 'I have come to sacrifice to the LORD.'

3  Invite Jesse to the sacrifice, and I will show you what you shall do; and you shall anoint for me the one whom I name to you."

4  Samuel did what the LORD commanded, and came to Bethlehem. The elders of the city came to meet him trembling, and said, "Do you come peaceably?"

5  He said, "Peaceably; I have come to sacrifice to the LORD; sanctify yourselves and come with me to the sacrifice." And he sanctified Jesse and his sons and invited them to the sacrifice.

6  When they came, he looked on Eliab and thought, "Surely the Lord's anointed is now before the LORD."

7  But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for the LORD does not see as mortals see; they look on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart."

8  Then Jesse called Abinadab, and made him pass before Samuel. He said, "Neither has the LORD chosen this one."

9  Then Jesse made Shammah pass by. And he said, "Neither has the LORD chosen this one."

10  Jesse made seven of his sons pass before Samuel, and Samuel said to Jesse, "The LORD has not chosen any of these."

11  Samuel said to Jesse, "Are all your sons here?" And he said, "There remains yet the youngest, but he is keeping the sheep." And Samuel said to Jesse, "Send and bring him; for we will not sit down until he comes here."

12  He sent and brought him in. Now he was ruddy, and had beautiful eyes, and was handsome. The LORD said, "Rise and anoint him; for this is the one."

13  Then Samuel took the horn of oil, and anointed him in the presence of his brothers; and the spirit of the LORD came mightily upon David from that day forward. Samuel then set out and went to Ramah.

By and by.  My grandmother used to say that to us all the time when I was a little boy.

We’d say, “Grammie, can we have some ice cream?”

She’d just smile and say, “By and by.”

Now I was pretty naïve when I was growing up.  So, it took me a long time to figure out that “by and by” was something my grandmother said so she wouldn’t have to answer the question.

Are you a by and by kind of person?  Do you ever say to yourself, “I’ll take care of that problem by and by.”  “I’ll have that heart to heart conversation with my sister by and by.”  “I’ll start exercising and loose that weight by and by.”  “I’ll tell her that I love her by and by.”

Now sometimes the by and by strategy works.  It used to work for Napoleon.  He always told his secretary Bourrienne to wait three weeks before he opened any of his letters. By doing that Napoleon noted that many of the problems in the letters took care of themselves and no longer needed his attention. 

Sometimes the by and by strategy works.  Most of the time though it doesn’t.  Just look at what happened that day when Samuel went to Bethlehem. The situation wasn’t all that complicated.  Samuel was there on a mission.  God sent him there to anoint the person who was going to be the next king of Israel.  Samuel didn’t know who it was going to be exactly.  He just knew that it was going to be one of Jesse’s sons.  So, when he got there Jesse made each of his sons come and stand before Samuel.  Jesse started with his oldest son and then worked his way down to the youngest.  Each time though the verdict was the same.  “Neither has the LORD chosen this one.”  Samuel couldn’t figure out what was going on until he discovered the one of Jesse’s sons was missing.  That son’s name was David and he was out in the fields tending the sheep. 

If you read between the lines it’s clear that Jesse couldn’t believe that God could possibly want David to be the next king of Israel.  David was too young.  David was too inexperienced.  Instead of taking Jesse’s word for it though Samuel put his foot down.  Samuel issued an ultimatum.  Samuel told them that they weren’t going to sit down and eat until they brought David to him.  They weren’t going to do anything until they brought David to him.  “Send and bring him;” Samuel said, “for we will not sit down until he comes here."  Samuel didn’t care how long they had to wait.  They weren’t going to take care of the unfinished business by and by.  They were going to take care of it ASAP.  Samuel was going to make sure that God’s will was done. 

Sometimes that’s what happens when it comes to your unfinished business.  You decide to put it on the back burner and go on to other things, but then God shows up and says, “Not so fast.  Forget about the by and by.  You can’t go on with your life until you take care of this unfinished business.”

Sometimes the unfinished business is a broken relationship.  You need to apologize to someone or you need to forgive someone who did you wrong. Sometimes the unfinished business is a broken heart.  When someone you love dies you have to grieve that person’s death. You need to do that before you can go on with your life and find someone else to love.  When you move to a new community you have to grieve the loss of all the people who were a big part of your life. You need to do that before you can go on and make knew friends.  Sometimes the unfinished business is an attitude adjustment that needs to take place.  Maybe you look down on a certain kind of people or you think that you know what’s best when you really don’t or you have a temper that gets you into trouble from time to time.

That need for an occasional attitude adjustment is what makes a story about Adam and Eve amusing but also insightful.  As you know after creating the heavens and the earth God created Adam and Eve. The first thing God said to them was, “Don’t.” 

“Don’t what?” Adam replied.

“Don’t eat the forbidden fruit,” God said.

“Forbidden fruit?” Adam exclaimed.  “We got forbidden fruit?  Hey Eve! We got forbidden fruit.”

“No way.”  “Yes way!”

“DON’T EAT THAT FRUIT!” God said emphatically.

“Why?”

“Because I’m your Father and I said so!” God said, wondering at that point why he hadn’t stopped after making the elephant.

Well, not too long after that God saw his kids having an apple break and became very angry.

“Didn’t I tell you not to eat the fruit?” God asked.

“Uh huh,” Adam replied.

“Then why did you?”

“I dunno,” Eve replied.

“She started it!” Adam insisted. 

“Did not!”  

“Did too!”  

“Did NOT!”  

At that point God decided that enough was enough.  So, God’s punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus, the pattern was set and has never changed.

Sometimes the unfinished business is an attitude adjustment that needs to take place.

Sometimes it’s a problem that you need to face.  Maybe you or someone in the family drinks a little too much or you’re trying to live above your means or you’re not dealing with a family issue that’s been festering for a long time.  Sometimes the unfinished business is a dream that you need to give up on because it just isn’t going to happen.  Then again it could be a situation where you need to take the bull by the horns and make the dream come true.  A good example of that is the 80 year old great grandmother who graduated a week or so ago from one of the colleges here in Boston.  Maybe you saw her on television receiving her diploma.

No matter what the unfinished business may be it’s no different from what happened that day in Bethlehem.  You can’t go on with your life until you take care of the unfinished business and God’s will is done.  If you do, things will never feel quite right.  You’ll always have that ache in your heart or that fear in the back of your mind.

Mark Twain once said, “Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.”  Maybe so, but God isn’t a fan of the by and by approach to life’s problems and God can and will wait you out. 

Fred Craddock, one of the great preachers of the last century, told a story once that shows you how God will nudge you a little and maybe even nag you a little when it comes to your unfinished business.  When Craddock was a graduate student at Vanderbilt studying for his oral exams he used to go to an all night coffee shop every night around 11:30 for a cup of coffee and a grilled cheese sandwich. It got to the point where the man behind the counter knew what he wanted without even having to ask. Craddock wrote, “He’d give me a refill, sometimes come again and give me another refill. I joined the men of the night sitting there hovering over coffee, still thinking about my own possible questions about the New Testament oral exams.

Then I noticed a man who was there when I went in, but had not been waited on. I had been waited on, had a refill, and so had the others. Then finally the man behind the counter went to the man at the end of the counter and said, “What do you want?” He was an old, gray-haired black man. Whatever the man said, the fellow went to the grill, scooped up a little dark patty off the back of the grill, put in on a piece of bread without condiment and without a napkin. Then cook handed it to the man, who gave him some money, and then went out the side door by the garbage can and out on the street. He sat on the curb with the eighteen-wheelers of the night with the salt and pepper from the street to season his sandwich. I didn’t say anything. I did not reprimand, protest, or witness to the cook. I did not go out and sit beside the man on the curb, on the edge. I didn’t do anything.  I was thinking about the questions coming up on the New Testament. And I left the little place, went up the hill back to my room to resume my studies, and off in the distance I heard a cockcrow.”

     (Craddock Stories, Mike Graves &Richard F. Ward, eds.

St. Louis, Chalice Press, 2001  pp. 48-49)

When it comes to unfinished business you get to decide when you’re going to deal with it.  If you decide to deal with it by and by though don’t be surprised if God shows up and nags you a little.  That’s because God knows that you really can’t move on with your life until you take care of that unfinished business.  Amen.

Rev. Dr. Richard A. Hughes

June 18, 2006