Now we’re not talking about those day to day trials and tribulations that are a part of every relationship.  Take the mother for example who found herself standing in an airport one day with her son. The son was heading off to college for the first time.  After giving him a tearful hug the mother reminded him to keep in touch. Another woman who was standing nearby heard the mother’s plea. So, after the son disappeared through the metal detector she spoke up. “You know,” she said, “I have a suggestion.  If you want him to keep in touch just write him a letter and say, ‘Here’s $50.  Spend it anyway you like.”  The mother was confused.  “How will that make him keep in touch?” she asked.  The woman smiled.  “It’s simple,” she said, “You forget to include the $50.”

Every relationship has its headaches.  Every relationship has its ups and downs.  The question is what do you do when someone really breaks your heart?  That was a question that Mary had to answer for herself. That’s because Mary had a son who broke her heart.  That may surprise you, but it’s true. Believe it or not Mary’s relationship with Jesus wasn’t all sunshine and roses. In fact, after Jesus is born Mary appears four times and each time she gets hurt by something Jesus says or does.

The first time you see Mary after Jesus is born is when Jesus is 12 years old.  Do you remember what happened when Jesus was 12 years old?  He gets lost when the family goes to Jerusalem for the Passover.  When Mary and Joseph realize he’s missing, they search diligently for him.  They finally find him in the Temple having a deep theological conversation with the elders and the scribes. When Mary tells Jesus how worried they were does Jesus apologize?  No. What he does is give her a rather flip answer. “Did you not know,” he says, “that I must be in my Father’s house?” Now I don’t know about you, but if I said something like that to my mother when I was growing up I wouldn’t have been able to sit down for the rest of the day.  Today, I think it might earn you a time out.

The second time you see Mary after Jesus is born is at the wedding in Cana of Galilee.  That’s where Jesus performed his first miracle by turning water into wine.  It all started when Mary comes to him with the news that the wedding hosts have run out of wine.  It’s clear from her words that she wants Jesus to do something about it, but instead of helping them out Jesus gets angry. “Oh woman,” he says rather indignantly, “what concern is that to you and to me?  My hour has not yet come.”  Those words must have stung a little.

The third time you see Mary after Jesus is born is while he’s teaching in a crowded house.   Someone tells him that his mother and brothers are outside.  Instead of running outside, however, for a Hallmark moment with his family Jesus says something that must have been very painful for Mary to hear. Jesus turns to the people in the house with him and says, “Here are my mother and my brothers.” Those words must have stung big time.

Three times Mary gets hurt and in spite of all those painful moments she’s still there at the foot of the Cross when Jesus is crucified.  That’s the fourth time you see Mary after Jesus in born.  Once again her heart is broken. This time though her heart isn’t broken by what Jesus does.  It’s broken by what his enemies do to him.

Even so I wonder if Mary ever thought about putting Jesus in the rearview mirror.  I wonder if she ever got to the point where she was tempted to call it quits. It wouldn’t surprise me if at some point she said to herself, “Okay.  Enough is enough.  How many times am I going to let my heart be broken like this?”

Sometimes that’s what you want to do when someone breaks your heart. You want to get away from the person or get even with the person.  Radio commentator Paul Harvey told a story once about a woman who chose the second course of action.  It happened when a man walked into the bank where she worked wearing a motorcycle helmet and carrying a gun. Because the woman was in her fifties and had a gentle face the man quickly decided that she would make an easy mark.  So, he walked over and handed her a note. The note of course told her to give him all the money in her draw or he’d start shooting. The woman reached for her draw as she read the note. All of a sudden though her eyes began to flash with rage and she began to grit her teeth. The next thing the robber knew the woman was standing there with the draw in her hand. Instead of giving him the money though she took the draw and started hitting him over the head with it.  She hit him again and again and again. The money in the draw flew all over the place.  “Shame on you!” the women kept shouting.  Finally, the robber turned around and ran out of the bank.  The police caught him a little while later hiding in some bushes not too far from the bank. Later the police were perplexed by the woman’s behavior. They asked her why she changed her mind and didn’t give him the money.  “Because,” she said very defiantly, “in his note there was a very naughty word.”

Sometimes that’s what you want to do when someone breaks your heart. You really want to let the person have it.  Mary didn’t do that though.  Even though her heart had been broken over and over and over again she never stopped loving Jesus.  She went with him all the way to the Cross.